Philomena - Calls for Open Irish Adoption Records

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Philomena - Calls for Open Irish Adoption Records

Postby ladyarcher » Mon Jan 27, 2014 3:36 pm

I just saw a brief notice about this on the Computer news feed, with a picture of Philomena and of course the actress Judi Dench.......according to the article Philomena and her daughter are trying to get the Irish records available, which apparently they are not........it would be good if this could also apply to records generally in Great Britain............. although records are technically available, we all know from experience that it is not as easy as it sounds........

LA
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Re: Philomena - Calls for Open Irish Adoption Records

Postby sylvie » Tue Jan 28, 2014 12:54 pm

Thanks for this info LA.

In the US, there is a huge push for people who have been adopted to have the same access to their original birth certificates and other personal documents as non-adopted people. I've been made aware of this by reading First Mother Forum, as well as other websites run by adopted people.

As well as recognising the personal issues (and insult) resulting from adopted people not having access to information about their own lives in the same way that others do, it is also seen as a fight for civil rights and equality - that we all should be able to have access and ownership of the facts of our lives, not just those who haven't been adopted.

First Mother Forum also obliterated the myth that most first mothers don't want contact (a reason often cited by those who want records to remain sealed), showing that those who refuse reunion contact are in the absolute miniscule of mothers.

I like the site http://www.firstmotherforum.com as there are some very good and usually thoughtful discussions that go on involving first mothers, adopted people and thinking adoptive parents. So it becomes a many-perspective discussion, which I like (same as on here).
Reunited with my beloved son after decades of separation which began when I was a young teenager and he was newly born, and finally ended a few years ago when we met again as fully-grown adults.
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Re: Philomena - Calls for Open Irish Adoption Records

Postby ladyarcher » Wed Jan 29, 2014 10:36 am

The idea that b.mothers do not want contact can easily be settled simply by whatever adoption search agency that an adoptee is using, asking the b.mother when she is found.........what a b.mother 'wanted' at the time of losing their child, and how her thoughts are some twenty or so years later are not going to necessarily be the same......... a b.mother's life and circumstances will have changed totally in the years between......so she should at least have the opportunity to state her wishes in the light of where she is 'now' not where she was when she was persuaded that her child would have a 'better life'..........

..... all this business of counselling for the adoptee if he/she was adopted before a certain time is rather odd to me.......and, I feel that it is insulting ........adoptees, for the most part, know that they are adoptees............. and birth mothers certainly know that they are birth mothers .......the reason given is that the birth mother, before I think the date was 1975 or thereabouts, were assured that they could never be found ........ in which case, why is it the adoptee who 'needs' counselling ...... it is surely the b.mother who needs support .......I detest the word 'counselling' ...... it smacks of someone knowing 'what is best for you' and persuading you of this ....... it may not actually be that way, but I just wish in the adoption circle it was given a different name.......

I have not looked at the first mothers forum ........ I will I think ...... one should get as rounded a view as possible ......

LA
Last edited by ladyarcher on Thu Jan 30, 2014 3:36 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: Philomena - Calls for Open Irish Adoption Records

Postby cleo » Thu Jan 30, 2014 6:45 am

Hi LA,

just quickly read your comment and totally agree, i will write again later on, i find it hard to accept too that its seems that only adoptees are allowed to "know" about what happened, yet b.mums are given no information whatsoever :-(

As i travel on in my journey since my son came looking for me, i'm finding brick walls all the time, so frustrating.
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Re: Philomena - Calls for Open Irish Adoption Records

Postby cleo » Mon Feb 03, 2014 6:25 pm

Hi all

Well yes i find it hard to understand, while on my journey, why its mainly focused on the adoptee needing all the support and help, what about the birthmums, i have tired to find out information about my son, but get told, we cannot give out this sort of information!!! Yet adoptee's seem to have easier access to have birth certificates etc. I just seem to be up against a brick wall all of the time. And what doe'snt help is that my son has such a common name and surname, its like looking for a needle in a haystack :-(

I think birthmums should have the rights to see the files too, if they want to look for their children. My son did ask me when he first found me, why did'nt i come looking for him...i told him i did'nt even know where to look, i had no name or where abouts in the country he was...i was lead to believe that he'd be in another part to me...but then 30 years on found he lived not more than 15minutes away from my parents house.

Can you imagine what it feels like to now know that you may have crossed your son at any given time in the shopping mall or at the park etc, not knowing he was your son, i know i felt auwful. And to then be told by SS that he was adopted nearby because i was of 'no risk' to the ss because of my age!!!!

So that makes me out, well it made me fee,l like a naive stupid person......Times have changed so i hear....for who? It seems all one sided to me to be honest, sorry
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Re: Philomena - Calls for Open Irish Adoption Records

Postby cleo » Fri Feb 28, 2014 1:17 pm

Hi all, doe's anyone know if the film is out on dvd yet? thanksyou
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Re: Philomena - Calls for Open Irish Adoption Records

Postby Donotunderstand » Sun Mar 02, 2014 9:41 am

Hi,

According to Amazon the release date is 24th March.
Aunt to a sibling group split up by Adoption and Residence Orders. Mum to birth children age 28 & 26, and adopted 14 year old (youngest of the sibling group)
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Re: Philomena - Calls for Open Irish Adoption Records

Postby cleo » Mon May 12, 2014 1:18 pm

thanks i will have a look for it
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Re: Philomena - Calls for Open Irish Adoption Records

Postby cleo » Fri May 23, 2014 7:36 am

i have the film will let you know
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