confused

Moderator: AfterAdoption

confused

Postby samantha » Sat Mar 17, 2007 10:22 pm

I will get to see my birth mum at the end of this year or the start of next year. It sounds like it is ages of but i am confused. I do want to see her and think it will solve all of my feelings, but it may not. Sometimes i cant stand my adoptive mum to touch me and when they are talking to me i just want to kill them. A really strong feeling of hate and resentment will suddenly build up and then i will feel really guilty. I dont feel like connected to my adoptive mum and dad as much as prob shud do. I think about my mum all the time, and gets me donw how i cant be with her. I feel alienated from people cos all i want is my birth mum. I was just wondering if anyone knew how to change/distract/ignore these really strong feelings of longing for your mum to be next to you and being incomplete when you know you still have to wait untill your 18?
samantha
 
Posts: 60
Joined: Tue Mar 06, 2007 10:37 pm
Location: Merseyside

Postby marzxxx » Sun Mar 18, 2007 7:53 pm

Hi Samantha.

Firstly, your feelings are natural that's one thing you have to keep in mind. :)

Secondly, you will have a deep love for your a/parents, however, you have a lot going on right now, more than what most teenagers are dealing with, so you are bound to be confused and frustrated. You just have to be patient basically. The time to meet your natural mum will come around sooner than you think, so use this time to think clearly about what you want, and prepare yourself for a roller-coaster ride.

I really hope everything works out for you, and your dreams come true.
marzxxx
 
Posts: 166
Joined: Wed Mar 22, 2006 1:21 pm

Postby samantha » Sun Mar 18, 2007 9:54 pm

thank u marz. I understand what your saying about being patient. jus seems u have to be patient for long time, and when there's while to go you can make urself accept it after a bit, jus with me bein 18 this year jus proving hard but yeh i will try and be patient. I dont know whether to try and get in contact with my birth sisters or not though. cos they mite not want to know me or something. And dont know whether to try and get in touch with my birth dad, eventhough one day he just suddenly stopped turning up for the meetings. So he probably didnt want to stay in touch or have any contact with me in the future, but because i dont know that for definite, it jus makes me wonder whether shoudl try and find out for definite or not. But if he didnt want any conctact then he might jus be horrible to me, and give me verbal abuse and stuff, because he is aggressive, and i could feel like it was my fault even more. Sorri. Does anyone have been in similar situation or know wat to do?
samantha
 
Posts: 60
Joined: Tue Mar 06, 2007 10:37 pm
Location: Merseyside


Return to Young People

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 2 guests

cron