Moderator: AfterAdoption


Postby cleo » Sun Dec 07, 2014 7:52 am

Hello everyone


Sadly my son has said he wants nothing more to do with me... i'm totally heartbroken, there are no words how i feel, but at least now i know, after waiting 2 years for an answer!!! I guess being honest with a person is not the solution, you only end up getting hurt, if Young adoptee's are looking for their birthparents, think alot before contacting them, you may be surprised that you have a birthparent like me, that has waited years to hear from her son...only to find out that he did not want a relationship, he just wanted to find out why he was adopted and to know about his past...never make promises to your birthparents that you will not keep, like saying that 'we'll always be in contact'...because you never know what will happen in a few years.....

Please don't forget that there are not only your feelings to think about, but your birthparents too...they do hurt, and after so any years of not knowing to have you finally back in their lives, they are overwhelmed, please have patience and try and understand from their point of view too.

If your only looking for your birthparents to find out about your past but nothing else, tell them this at the very beginning, do not string them along and then suddenly cut them off.

I only wish adoption was not so painful for everyone involved, but i have found out that whatever we do wether its right for us, could be wrong for somebody else. We all act and react differently, its so hard to find equal paths. I wish you all the best of luck
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