Spam

Just general chat

Moderator: AfterAdoption

Re: Spam

Postby sylvie » Mon Oct 29, 2012 8:42 am

Hi All

I've written a few PMs to the moderators/admin of this forum over the last few months - about the possibility of getting new headings for the forum (following a discussion we had a while ago about having a Resource Area, and a Forum Gems section, for example) but - despite my messages being read, I got no response.
I've also PMd them about the spam too but the silence is deafening.

This site is so precious, and the conversation space (and library) on it so important that it mustn't be allowed to be overrun by Spam.
Reunited with my beloved son after decades of separation which began when I was a young teenager and he was newly born, and finally ended a few years ago when we met again as fully-grown adults.
sylvie
 
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Re: Spam

Postby Turtle » Mon Oct 29, 2012 11:59 am

As far as I am aware Josie, a moderator is different to admin. The moderators basically rid the site of spam and also watch the site and notify admin if any major problems come up. So I don't really see a problem with AA taking on volunteer moderators, especially if we are talking long term members with a proven track record. As a moderator you only have limit ability on the site.

Skybluepink, I think that members are added automatically after going through the registration processes which basically checks for spam bots. I don't think anyone is actively pressing a button at the other end - although I can check on that one.

Either AA want to run this site or not. I don't think that notifying them of a problem, will have any effect on that. They are bound to log on at some point and see what is going on. If we don't notify them, then the situation will probably be worse by the time they have a look. That way they may feel that none of us care. I think it is better for them to see that there are genuine members who are interested in keeping the site spam free and up and running as a good information point for all those dealing with adoption.

Sites like this don't actually cost that much to run, but if they need donations to keep it up and running, then they need to make that clear.
Turtle
 
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Re: Spam

Postby caoimhesmum » Mon Oct 29, 2012 1:12 pm

First post so be kind
I registered In August but my account was not activated so I tried emailing but got no response eventually phoned the helpline and was told the guy that activated the memberships requests was on holidayand would be back in a fortnight I waited another 2-3 weeks but then phoned again as still couldnt access the site and this time was put through to some one else in the building who took details shortly after my mebership was activated So there is definately someone there that is responsible for membership stuff Maybe a phone call to the helpline and ask to be put through to the moderator might be the way to go.
I will probably keep lurking for now as I have only just found my birth mother (very positive response) but I am still trying to cope with all the emotions flying around.
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Re: Spam

Postby ladyarcher » Mon Oct 29, 2012 2:02 pm

Hello Caoimhesmum ...

... and welcome, please don't be put off by the spam problem that is being a nuisance on the forum at the moment ........ and don't worry about just lurking for a while, a lot of people find it useful to do this while they are sorting out their feelings about whatever place they are in with regard to their adoption at the time.........

So glad that you have got a good response, you will have seen from your lurking that often being found can make some b.mothers react with a shock withdrawal....... sometimes this sadly is permanent as they find it so difficult to suddenly reconnect with feelings that they had buried........other times they are able to come to terms with it, often of course it means telling a husband and later children about their past......and they can be forgiven for finding this a very scary idea.......

Keep lurking, and come back at any time when you feel a need......... there will always be someone here to listen, support, suggest how perhaps they have dealt with a similar experience......... also of course, if you feel you can help someone with your experiences, that is always very welcome too.....

LA
born 1944 - adopted 1946 - found b.mother 1972 - sadly missed b.father who died young but who had told his subsequent children that they had two English sisters so when I made contact with them in Canada they were not shocked......three years ago, finally found younger full sister who had been adopted seperately....I found out about her when I was 25, it took me 40 years to find her......we are now good friends......
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Re: Spam

Postby Turtle » Mon Oct 29, 2012 2:13 pm

Hi caoimhesmum.

Welcome to the site. As ladyarcher says, please don't be put off by all the spam. Hopefully we will eventually get that sorted out. It is worth persevering with the site. There are some lovely people on here. I have only been on here a few weeks, and after a bit of a shaky start, was made to feel very welcome. The knowledge of some of the people on here about the adoption process is amazing. On top of that, people are very understanding and willing to listen to both sides of the story.

Lurk as much as you want, but when you feel ready, do get involved as you will find that the people on here are very understanding.
Turtle
 
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Re: Spam

Postby Josie » Mon Oct 29, 2012 5:48 pm

Hi Turtle,

Thanks for the definition of moderator versus admin. Aha, so we COULD have voluntary moderators to clean up spammers ( which is all that is needed) outside of the AA task force.
If there is only one sole person responsible for moderating at AA, then it's surely time to either set up a roster internally or delegate to voluntary members.... sickness, personal emergencies and crisis, along with normal holiday absences could impact on how much time a sole moderator can afford.
Given the experience of new member Caoim, it sounds like holidays DO impact the time spent on forum work.

To be fair, AA forum has been amazingly self sufficient - it doesn't demand intervention from moderators re posters as we all sort things out between ourselves with mature dialogue, which in itself is a quite unique.
So perhaps, the forum doesn't attract much attention for the AA task force.
Sounds like it's one of those boring jobs that gets delegated to some possibly reluctant soul! (Who may be away sick, having an emergency operation or any sort of human crisis)

Guess it's just time for a change to how things are done re forum.
Josie
 
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Re: Spam

Postby Turtle » Mon Oct 29, 2012 6:55 pm

I must admit, I find it a bit unsettling that there is no one actually over seeing the site. It is so easy for just one person to be disruptive. I have come across that before. The bulk of the time, people are really considerate, but you do get the odd troll that will go out of their way to cause trouble. I was targeted once, and it is not funny. It makes you feel quite ill. I don't think it was personal as such, as this person then went to another site and did the same thing, immediately after being banned from the site I was using. So I think he was picking more on random people. He obviously just liked causing trouble and drawing attention to himself.
Turtle
 
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Re: Spam

Postby athensrunner » Mon Oct 29, 2012 7:22 pm

I sent a message to After Adoption on FB and actually got a response from an marketing and information officer and was informed that the relevant staff member have now been informed and will be looking into the problem. Hopefully, some action will be taken over the next couple of days... although I agree that having a closed FB group in addition to the forum is a good idea.
Birth mother in an international adoption

Feel free to read my ramblings as a birth mother
http://www.athensrunner.blogspot.com
athensrunner
 
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Re: Spam

Postby Turtle » Mon Oct 29, 2012 7:41 pm

That sounds really positive athensrunner. Let's hope that we will soon see the last of the Ugg boots ads.
Turtle
 
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Re: Spam

Postby Josie » Mon Oct 29, 2012 7:45 pm

Hi Turtle,

AA has intervened in the long distant past, where requested by members.
But that's what is great about this forum, AA has evolved a consistently self-regulating spirit.
Personally, I don't feel the slightest bit troubled by not feeling the presence of an overseer/ moderator.
And really, that's what perhaps some of us who have stuck around for a few years, months or whatever have come to appreciate.
The "hands off" approach.
With the moderating hat held by external "moderators" who do not become members or get involved in discussions - it leaves us, as forum members to freely communicate.
It leaves us forum members free to withdraw for periods without any acknowledgement and to participate again without any fanfare. Many of us have periods where emotionally, we need to withdraw, quietly.
We see that happen here time and time again. And it's respected and not questioned.
None of us have a responsibility to the forum, or are recognised as holding some special authority.
We feel free to post as much or as little as we can manage.

I really would just like to see the spam dealt to - that's all.
A reasonable in- house roster set up within AA.
It leaves the members, old timers or newbies, free to enjoy visiting the "room", quietly or loudly express deeply felt emotions, experiences and to then quietly leave to step outside for a breather, without having to worry about cleaning up or doing any housework.
Josie
 
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Re: Spam

Postby Josie » Mon Oct 29, 2012 7:48 pm

Oops, just posted whilst Athensrunner had posted :-)
Thanks dear Athens! sounds like it's being taken care of.

Sounds like there are a few who would love a FB site in addition to this.
Good suggestion.
Josie
 
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Re: Spam

Postby ladyarcher » Mon Oct 29, 2012 7:56 pm

That's sounding hopeful AthensR ........afraid I did not get round to phoning today, although I had intended to.......

Very apt summing up Josie........the whole ethos of this forum is kind and supportive, and as you say relaxed......people can drop in, hopefully get help, then step back without anyone pressurising them for any reason......... sometimes if one hasn't heard from someone for a while, a kindly......'how are things' is often sent.......just so people don't feel they are forgotten........love the bit about not having to do any 'housework'....... :P

LA
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Re: Spam

Postby Turtle » Mon Oct 29, 2012 8:16 pm

Have you never had a problem with trolls on here then? I am surprised. I think discussion between genuine adoptees/adoptive parents and birth parents could be solved amicably, but when someone comes on a forum, who is not linked to the topic and is out to cause trouble, then that is a different matter.
Turtle
 
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Re: Spam

Postby athensrunner » Mon Oct 29, 2012 8:52 pm

I just noticed on the FB page for After Adoption, they and have responded to L12's comment and again promised to let the site administrators know about the problem. I find it odd that the only response we have had from them are through FB rather through the forum. Then again, as long as they take some action it is all good.

As for a FB group, is there any volunteers to set it up? If not, I'm happy to do that, if you all want a group set up that is... and I would leave it up to one of you to come up with the name.
Birth mother in an international adoption

Feel free to read my ramblings as a birth mother
http://www.athensrunner.blogspot.com
athensrunner
 
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Re: Spam

Postby ladyarcher » Mon Oct 29, 2012 10:20 pm

Turtle, enlighten me........ I could ask my kids but they would laugh at my ignorance........so what and who is a Troll and what precisely do they do,....... do they clog up the site like the Ugg problem, or do they have no connection to Adoption, or whatever a particular site is for, and make personal comments/replies to genuine posters .......I sort of have the impression from peoples' comments that it is the latter........

AR........Have not seen the FB After Adoption page...... I did not even know that there was one..........odd, as you say, that the answer has come via there and not to one or all of the many of us who have posted constantly by reporting on the Forum, to the moderator and other parts of the site........still, if it works that, as you say, is good of course.........

LA
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